So, work sucks, you’re bored, and your relationship is not doing it for you anymore… Now what? Have you ever thought to hire a coach to help you? Many people report their successes after working with a life coach. And, it’s exciting to consider for yourself. Let’s face it, how often have you had someone strictly devoted to your performance and well-being? But how do you know when to hire a coach? How do you know what you’re getting when the market seems completely saturated? If you’ve ever wondered why people hire coaches, here are some things to consider when looking for a coach, and determining if it’s a viable next step for you. Review these 8 indicators to see if working with a coach may help.
1. Your confidence is not where you want it to be.
Self-confidence is built on many things. People don’t just enter the world as confident, or not. Instead, many attributions, skills talents, and aspects work together to build your confidence. However, one determining factor that builds confidence is when you take on challenges and do hard things. And, what’s important is not whether you ‘win’ or succeed. But what is most important is that you attempt, learn, and build on your experiences along the way. Some people call this failing forward. Coaching is an experiential agreement where you bring a non-biased accountability partner to weigh-in. If you’d like to build confidence in areas where you feel less accomplished, a coaching relationship can help you move forward.
2. A coach can help navigate unresolved feelings below the surface.
Everyone has battle scars. You don’t live this long without some. But, the distinction between those who are happy is that they have learned to distance themselves from past feelings, and accepted the past as the past. They’ve done some work to let the past pain go. Holding unresolved feelings feels much like holding an air-filled beach ball under the water… and, it can be simply exhausting. You can work to consistently push it down, but feelings of grief, trauma, or sadness have a way of creeping back. When you hire a coach, you have a professional partner to help you face those wounds and heal. I believe that when uncovering emotional feelings, you must feel them. And, the only way out of pain is to experience it and live through it. Hiring a professional coach to guide you through your pain can help you unlock emotions, feel those unresolved emotions, let go and move forward.
3. You’re moody, irritable, or unhinged too often.
Do you find yourself in a state of emotional reactivity too often? Perhaps you find yourself rumbling with friends or family members too often. Maybe you’ve become exceptionally sarcastic or negative. Perhaps you’re engaging in road rage or fighting with your partner too often. Deep down you’re wondering: What is going on? Why do I fight so hard? It’s possible you’re living out of alignment with what matters most to you. If this describes you, consider working with a coach who can help you untangle those threads and tether back to your moorings.
4. Hire a coach when you’re spinning your wheels.
There’s nothing worse than feeling as though every day is the same and no matter what you do, you’re not getting ahead. Perhaps you’re treading water, floating along, or avoiding some big, (perhaps risky) decisions.
When you’re spinning your wheels, often this is marked by lacking follow-through, inaction, and feeling unsettled. If you’re stuck spinning your wheels in the face of a laundry list of things to do, now may be a good time to hire a coach to help you find your way forward. If you’re in a constant breakdown, coaching helps you sort out the root causes, and then remove obstacles (whether real or perceived) that may be in your way to your goals.
5. You have ADHD and your habits are blocking your progress.
Do you have a hunch or actual diagnosis of ADHD? Do you find yourself stuck procrastinating all the time? If so, your neurochemistry may be at odds with your aspirations. If you find yourself enslaved by your poor habits, lost in distraction, or overperforming in some places, yet just sliding by in others, you may really benefit from working with an ADHD-trained Coach. Regardless of a diagnosis, if you have a hunch you have ADHD, even working for a short period of time with an ADHD-trained coach can make all the difference for you.
You may have a clear idea about where you want to be, but continue to make self-destructive decisions tied to habits that are less than useful. If you hire a coach, that person can help you build awareness around how your particular ADHD effects stand in your way. Over time, seeing your ADHD in plain sight can help you avoid the pitfalls, and build more useful habits to usher you toward more consistent performance and results.
6. You’re overwhelmed too often.
Let’s face it. Life’s chaos can creep up at any time and throw your sense of balance out of control. When you can no longer deal with overwhelm with a good old list or brain dump, you may need some professional help. If you feel overwhelmed often and have failed at attempts to get on track, coaching can be a good stop along the way. Perhaps your home or apartment is a hot mess, and chronically disorganized, or you keep forgetting appointments.
Many clients come to coaching driven by feeling overwhelmed. Overwhelm can crop up from external factors, but for some, it is a pattern and coping mechanism. When this happens, you must begin inside your head with your thoughts, ideas, and beliefs. This is commonly referred to as mindset.
7. You’re in transition.
Transitions have a known path. When in transition, you move through liminal space. Liminal spaces are those times where you’re not where you ‘were’ in the past, yet have not yet arrived at your desired future goal. Liminal spaces are the elevators, escalators, and stairwells of your life. The times that are no longer the past, but, not yet where you’re heading in the future. If you’re in transition you move through a series of uncharted waters, complete with a flood of emotions. So, if you’re considering a career change, or facing a significant life transition, coaching can support your transition. Transitions tend to amp up stress, anxiety, and uncertainty. When your foundation is shaking, it’s a great time to seek out support to effectively transition into your next steps of life.
8. You’re craving a bigger purpose.
If you’re awakened in the middle of the night feeling unfulfilled, you may need to do some deep soul-searching to uncover or reconnect with your ‘WHY’. Many feel that through guided introspection, you can find your purpose. Or perhaps your purpose and vision are so big you’re feeling stuck or overwhelmed with it all. A purpose-driven life pays attention to intuition, callings, and prompts built around strengths and values. If you’re feeling out of alignment with your purpose, this is a great time to hire a coach. Coaching offers a safe place to find your pieces, pull them together, and work toward connecting to your bigger purpose.
How Hiring A Coach Helped Me
Personally, I’ve worked with several coaches over my career. Each time, I’ve enhanced my skills, expanded my capacity, and the experience has led to a deepened level of self-awareness. Most specifically, I’ve changed my behavior to address some bad habits. Additionally, working with Coaches has helped me build my business, heal my marriage, fix my finances, make the transition from a corporate career to my own brand, create and market the TSSI, the world’s first time management and organizing styles assessment, and deepen my commitment to the work I do and therefore broaden the impact I make in the world.
So, you’re probably thinking, why hire a coach? Why not hire a shrink? The key difference between coaches and therapists is that mental health practitioners tend to focus on helping you look back to heal trauma or make sense of past behaviors. On the other hand, coaches help you take your focus from today forward. Coaching helps you move from intention to action. We focus on an inside-out strategy of positive psychology. While both approaches lie within the field of self-help, therapy is considered mental health.
Coaching sits on the imaginary line between self-efficacy, skills development, and deep awareness. We may dip our toe into the past, but not dwell there. Instead, we use the tool of observation to develop deep awareness. This helps you move from intention to action. Coaching sees perspective as a mirror to reflect back a type of mindful awareness. This helps you zoom out, and then pivot away from bad habits, and toward your goals and bigger purpose.
In summary, there are many reasons to hire a coach, yet no one needs a coach. Most certified coaches subscribe to the belief that you are naturally creative, resourceful, and whole, all on your own. A coach is trained to meet you where you are on your path and help to provide an imaginary ‘sandbox’ where you can explore, get curious, and experience yourself in a way that shifts your perspective. Strengths-based coaching is key to successful alignment, removing entrenched fears, and helping you move forward. A good coach will help you clear individual blocks, gain a deeper self-understanding, and reach levels of personal commitment and growth you’ve never experienced.
If you’d like to explore how coaching may work for you, schedule a complimentary Discovery Call with me and let’s see if we’re a match!